Crimson Bisque

Sunday, July 04, 2004

"Oh yeah i caught spiderman on opening day... i loved it man! i just like the part when spiderman is flying.. like he's so free.. or so focused and determined... depending on the situation... i wish i had that clarity sometimes no free time with small things nagging at the back of your mind... or being focused and determined without thinking of slacking off... haha i know it's all CGI... but i like the way the "camera" moves when he's "flying" and what i feel... it's like i'm a little girl again you know.. haha oh well call me childish but i'll still be happy when i see spidey swing across the screen.... "

Extract from my posting on Asunder... haha somehow didn't come through in my blog about watching spiderman 2... did i even blog abt that?! haha..

on to today's blog... an open letter...a la Neville Nah... but to God this time... but erm not abt the same thing.. though i did dream abt kylie minogue doing really strange things... like a movie like that... how she was for some reason telling me how to drive or something... well... ok that's not exactly it.. the details are sketchy... hmmm...probably got those weird dreams cos i was listening to the album fever as i slept this afternoon.... haha

Dear God

I vaguely remembered that was supposed to give testimony this morning when i woke up.. but i thought since no one contacted me about it.. that i wouldn't have to do it... in a way i was relieved... i don't quite relish public speaking and since it says in the bible that you know every hair on my head (yes even those that drop off... like all the time).. i'm pretty sure you knew that i would totally freak out if i actually had to do it...

but lo and behold... when i got to church and read the church sheet... my name was down for testimony and as you probably figured... i FREAKED OUT... saw sarah in the front row and went up to her.... and somehow well... wasn't quite convinced that i could go up there and talk abt it...

even when loren (the vicar) spoke to me i was freaking out... then it came to singing...

Over the mountains and the sea
Your river runs with love for me
And I will open up my heart
And let the healer set me free
I'm happy to be in the truth
And I will daily lift my hands
For I will always sing
Of when your love came down

[Chorus]
I could sing of your love forever
I could sing of your love forever
I could sing of your love forever
I could sing of your love forever

Over the mountains and the sea
Your river runs with love for me
And I will open up my heart
And let the healer set me free
I'm happy to be in the truth
And I will daily lift my hands
For I will always sing
Of when your love came down

[Chorus]
[Chorus]

Oh, I feel like dancing
This foolishness, I know
But when the world has seen the light
They will dance with joy
Like we're dancing now

[Chorus]
[Chorus]

the chorus just spoke to me.. i SHOULD sing of your love forever....

How lovely is your dwelling place. Oh lord almighty.
For my soul longs and even faints, for you.
For in my heart is satisfied (satisfied) within your presence.
I sing beaneth the shadow of your wings.

Chorus
Better is one one day in your courts.
Better is one day in your house.
Better is one day in your courts,
than thousands elsewhere.(REPEAT)

One thing I ask and I would seek to see your beauty.
To find you in the place your glory dwells.
One thing I ask and I would seek to see your beauty.
To find you in the place your glory dwells.

Chorus (2x)

My heart and flesh cry out.
To you the living God.
Your spirit is water to my soul.
I've tasted and i've seen.
Come once again to me,
I will draw near to you.
I will draw near to you. (to you)

I will draw near to you,I will draw near to you.

(2x)Better is one day, Better is one day,
Better is one day than thousands elsewhere.

Chorus (2x)

Thousands elsewhere. We want to know you.
Thousands elsewhere.
We will draw near to you.

how can i be worthy of a place in heaven when i don't even dare to speak for you?

Light of the world,
You stepped down into darkness.
Opened my eyes,
let me see.
Beauty that made this heart adore you
Hope of a life spent with you

And here I am to worship,
here I am to bow down,
here I am to say that you're my God
You're altogether lovely,
altogether worthy,
altogether wonderful to me.

King of all days,
oh, so highly exalted.
Glorious in heaven above.
Humbly you came
to the earth you created
All for love's sake became poor.

And here I am to worship
Here I am to bow down
Here I am to say that you're my God
You're altogether lovely.
altogether worthy,
altogether wonderful to me.

I'll never know how much it cost
To see my sin upon that cross
I'll never know how much it cost
To see my sin upon that cross
And I'll never know how much it cost
To see my sin upon that cross
No, I'll never know how much it cost

Here I am to worship
Here I am to bow down
Here I am to say that you're my God
You're altogether lovely
Altogether worthy
Altogether wonderful to me

And here I am to worship
Here I am to bow down
Here I am to say that you're my god
You're altogether lovely
Altogether worthy
Altogether wonderful
wonderful wonderful
Yes you are God

I'll never know how much it cost
To see my sin upon that cross
I'll never know how much it cost
To see my sin upon that cross

you ARE my God and i should be happy to declare that....

after singing those songs.. i felt ready some how.. i felt that God will be able to speak through me.. so hey.. i went up... not as nervous as i thought and even managed to crack a joke or two haha...

felt really good to share.. and this OMF woman came up and spoke to me... from england too! loads of positive feedback from my cousin and the rest of the youth...

shared abt how going away involved a lot of changes and growing up.. and of course struggles... but just to hang onto your faith and know that God is there.. and to know that God will complete the good work He began in you.

felt really good.. and for some reason i feel really refreshed as well... it helped that i got some sleep in the afternoon... maybe this hols won't be a complete waste... somehow i feel more connected to my church everytime i go home.... that's a good thing i suppose.. to feel rooted in singapore spiritually... i guess i was kinda worried abt being too eager to leave home.. that i would feel lost back home.. which i did for a while.. but now somehow it's all better.. and i feel at home at home... you know?

bought bedsheets today for my room in glasgow and took a drive in mum's car as well.. not bad.. still quite ok on the road... but erm mum claims i take turns too fast haha i think...

with mum's nagging... you know you're home haha

Inscribed @ 1:48 pm